About the Memory Channel Project

Memory Channel is the name of my creative project. It encompasses everything I do "solo" - songwriting, production, visual design, conlangs, essays, storytelling, etc. You could say it's my "altar ego" name, but it's really just a name, not a persona. I used to want that sort of persona, when I was making electronic music under the alias SiLHOUET, but with time I've learned the value of authenticity. I can only really perform as myself, Brendan. Rather than creating a new aesthetic to conform to a character, I've more recently chosen to incorporate into the project the concepts and emotions most dear and meaningful to me. I try and imbue my creations with both intensity and comfort, rage and calm, an overwhelming sense of dread and sublime beauty. My everyday experience is defined by this delicate balance. It's nothing special, which means it's incredibly special to me.

The name Memory Channel refers not to a media channel, as in TV, radio, or video, but to a water channel - a river. The town I grew up in had a river running right through the middle, which formed its whole identity throughout its quaint and ugly history. I've spent a lot of time on rivers and I've come to see how many things flow similarly. The Memory Channel is the current of memories in our heads that define who we are. We are never constant - we only define ourselves through the narratives of our lives. Our memories allow us to keep track of that, to have a somewhat stable idea of ourselves and to stay connected to our past, even when we want to run away from it. Memories can be frustrating, but they're more precious than we can ever truly articulate.

I named the project Memory Channel because of the importance I give to the concept, but also for aesthetic reasons, of course. It sounds kinda cool to me. And it also does evoke the hauntological idea of lost media channels and how any media channel can influence our own memories, which is something I find pretty interesting. I love my hauntology!

More specifically, as Memory Channel I mostly create a hybrid of electronic music and rock/metal, two of my favorite styles of music. It stems from my time making a mix of synthwave and EDM as SiLHOUET, and as I grew more interested in rock and metal, this influence eventually overtook the EDM stuff (although 2010's EDM will always have a special place in my heart). This blend of synthwave, EDM and metal (plus some dreampop notes) is seen most clearly on the first self-titled Memory Channel album. But regardless of genre, I most adore music that combines a powerful atmosphere with an underlying hypnotic intensity and cathartic climaxes.

By now, though, I'm quite far removed from where I was when I released that album in 2023, and more so from where I was when I started writing it a couple years earlier. I listen to different music now, and I've been learning the banjo for months. I'm in a much better state of mind and have a better sense of my priorities. I've spent a few years in a real local music scene instead of being on my computer. I got off social media. I'm always learning and growing like a sponge.

And what does this mean for Memory Channel? Well, I haven't really written much since that album, the same way it took me almost four years to write a new album after the final SiLHOUET release. I've been focusing on finishing school, playing with warmachine, producing for other musicians, spending time with my partner, and then in my free time...well, I haven't really felt like working on my own music or artwork. Instead I've been learning to brew, starting to read books again, learning to write with inkbrush, building my plant collection, making this website, and giving myself time to just exist. It's been quite blissful nourishing some parts of myself I didn't even fully know about before, and through this, I'm nourishing the project too. I'm giving myself space from the things I post on streaming services and social media, so I can ultimately raise the whole project up!

None of this is to say that I don't write or think about music anymore - almost every day, I have a musical idea I can't get rid of, and yet I usually fail to write it down. It's a bit of neglect and self-sabotage towards my music that I do want to address. But I also want to give myself permission to take baby steps, even if it takes another five or ten years to put out more music. If you're an artist or creative, and you're reading this, I want you to give yourself that permission too. Life is messy, busy, and complicated. Be honest with yourself about what you want and pursue that as much as you're able to - no more, no less. I'm right there with you.

I'll wrap up by talking a bit about what I see for the future of Memory Channel. The music I'm writing right now is a bit different from the previous album; it's heavier and more experimental. I'm taking new influence from styles like blackgaze, screamo, digital sound collage, darkwave/post-punk, and ambient Americana. Yes, I plan to incorporate the banjo into Memory Channel - it's a beautiful instrument steeped with history, and imbued with a spirit of holding onto joy even through grief. It's also made learning guitar a bit easier, and I want to use real guitars and drums in the next record in place of the electronic samples and distorted synth patches from the last one. My biggest hurdle is figuring out a drum recording situation, but I have an amp now that I can use for guitars. As I very slowly put together future music (baby steps), I also plan to continue designing visuals for it, informed more by inkbrushing. In the longer term, I want to finally begin more work on creative writing. Right now I've got the skeleton for a sci-fi/fantasy tale about the Kmám, a race that speaks my constructed language Ámro. I still wanna work on that, but I also have the itch to create more conlangs. The only other significant one I've made is a liturgical language for my own use, but it'd be illuminating to create more for all kinds of purposes. Every language is its own story!

Through alllll of this stuff, I plan to record it here. It's a very long journey ahead, but every step means something. Every inch is profound. I'm not sure what exactly the future holds for Memory Channel - plans can change - but thank you for visiting and caring! If you want to listen to Memory Channel, you can do so here.

The symbol I use in my logo represents balance for me, and the feeling that everything will be okay. I hope those feelings find you too. Be well!